I really want to do a post about chrismas, and post up the million pictures i got, but thats not whats on my mind.
A few days before christmas, one of my best friends witnessed her father in law commit suicide.
I wont put all the details in here, because no one else needs the mental pictures I have.
My Christmas was tainted by shorty (yes thats what we called him) killing himself.
I faked christmas spirit pretty well for the kids, but deep down I really wanted to just go curl up and cry. unfortunatly when i had the chance to do just that, the tears wouldnt come.
How could he do that? right before christmas? with her home? Yes, he was a PTSD inflicted old man on medication, but its not like he couldnt think properly. If you can leave a note saying your sorry, you should be able to realize that you will be traumatizing your daughter in law to the point she cant sleep at night and is afraid to go out in her own pasture alone.
Once upon a time in a different life, I thought about it myself but I couldnt do it. Thinking about how my mother would feel, visualizing the scene, I just couldnt.
I dont understand how anyone could be so selfish!!
All I can do is be the normal that she needs right now, not money grubbing relatives who just want to know if he left them any money in his suicide note, or someone wierd who doesnt know what to say so they dont say anything.
I think my next post will be a nice happy one with christmas pictures, I just needed to get all that out of the way first.
